Nepali Funny Jokes: Wife Girl Friend Joke

Showing posts with label Wife Girl Friend Joke. Show all posts

Nov 25, 2014

boys in brothel

Two men went 2 a borthel.
1st went in and came out n said “ what a waste of money.... my wife is better than her.”
2nd went in and came out n said “ Yes...U R right. Your wife is much better.”

Jun 24, 2012

Modern - remix ramayan - sms to Sita from Ram

Modern रामायणमा
रामको sms सिता लाई

प्रिय सितु, ...
म यहाँ मस्त छु ! and i hope तिमि पनि झक्कास छौ होला !!
लक्ष्मन् ले जहिले पनि तिमीलाई मिसगर्छ ! यार तिमि टेन्सन नलेउ म तिमीलाई छिटो भन्दा छिटो रावणको बाट छुटाएर ल्याउछु !
मैले NTC को सिम लेको छु !! अनि रावण को नम्बर मा कल गरेर मैले धेरै गाली देको छु !
साले ले battery low भयो भनेर फोन नै काटी दियो !
मैले तिमीलाई micromax को 30days battery dual सिम वाला mobile अनि 1GB कार्ड sad song हालेर मिस्टर हनुमान को साथ मा पठाउदै छु !
यसमा net surfing पनि छ ! अब तिमि र म net calling को मजा पनि लिन पाउछौ लक्ष्मन् topup कार्ड लिन गएको छ !
अनि सुनमैले बिभुसन लाई फेसबुक मा add गरेको छु लंका मा के हुदै छ सबै कुरा status मा अपडेट गर्दिन्छ !!

लौ त पछी chat मा कुरा गरौला bye
sweet heart

A man escapes from prison - jokes

A man escapes from prison where he has been for 15 years. He breaks into a house to look for money and guns and finds a young couple in bed.
He orders the guy out of bed and ties him to a chair, while tying the girl to the bed he gets on top of her, kisses her neck, then gets up and goes into the bathroom.
While he's in there, the husband tells his wife: "Listen, this guy's an escaped convict, look at his clothes! He probably spent lots of time in jail and hasn't seen a woman in years. I saw how he kissed your neck." If he wants s*x, don't resist, don't complain, do whatever he tells you. Satisfy him no matter how much he nauseates you. This guy is probably very dangerous. If he gets angry, he'll k*ll us. Be strong, honey. I love you."
To which his wife responds: "He wasn't kissing my neck. He was whispering in my ear. He told me he was gay, thought you were cute, and asked me if we had any vaseline. I told him it was in the bathroom. Be strong honey. I love you too!!"

Five Important Qualities of a good wife

Five Important Qualities of a good wife - a joke

1. It's important to have a woman, who helps at home, who cooks from time to time, cleans up and has a job.
2. It's important to have a woman, who can make you laugh.
3. It's important to have a woman, who you can trust and who doesn't lie to you.
4. It's important to have a woman, who is good in bed and who likes to be with you.
5. It's very, very important that these four women do not know each other.

Jun 14, 2012

don't mess-up with guy -10 हजार एक रातको ??

एउटि केटि cafe मा एक्लै बसिरहेकि थि

एक्लै देखेर एउटा केटालेगयेर भन्यो

के म तपाई संग बस्न सक्छु ???
अचानक
केटि (चिच्याई) : नाई , हुदैन आजको रात म तिमि संग बिताऊन सक्दिन...!!!

त्यत्रो भिडभाड मा सबै जानाले उनिहरुलाई हेर्न थाले ..!!
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बिचरा केटो लाजले रातो पिरो भयो ..!!

केहि छिन पछि केटिले त्यस केटा संग माफि मागिन

अनि बिस्तारै भनिन :त्यो के भने म " HUMAN NATURE को बारेमा अध्यान गर्दै छु

त्यसैले, जान्न चाहान्छु कि मान्छे ले लजाउदा(बेज्जत) हुदा कस्तो प्रतिक्रिया जनाउछन..!!"
फेरि अचानक
केटो (चिच्यायो) : What...?? 10 हजार एक रात ..??
यो त अतिनै भयो अलिक कम गरन plz ..!!
फेरि
सबैजाना केटिलाई हेरेर हास्न थाले..!!
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अनि केटाले बिस्तारै भन्यो : "लु अब आफै अनुभब गर..!!:

joke- Similarity Between Washing Machine & Girls?

Questions : Whats the Similarity Between Washing Machine & Girls?
Answer: Even If 1 Of These Is Not Available Then U Have To Use Ur Hands.

wife husband- think twice before speak :D

WIFE : What would you do if I die? Would you get married
again?
HUSBAND : No!

WIFE : Why not? Don't you like being married?
HUSBAND : Of course I do.

WIFE : Then why wouldn't you remarry?
HUSBAND : Ok, ok, I'd get married again.

WIFE : Would you live in our house?
HUSBAND : Yes, its a great house.

WIFE : Would you let her drive my car?
HUSBAND : Yes, its almost new.

WIFE : Would you give her my jewelry?
HUSBAND : No, I'm sure she would want her own.

WIFE : Would she wear my shoes?
HUSBAND : No, her size is 6.

WIFE : --silence-
HUSBAND : Oh 'shit'... :-O:-O =P

Jun 8, 2012

श्रीमती श्रीमान जेठाजु तौलिया

धारामा नुहाऐर फ़र्किऐपछि श्रीमतीले स्श्रिमान लाई भनिछ
श्रीमति - नुहाऐर एउटा तौलिया मात्र बेरेर फ़र्किदा बाटामा जेठाजु भेटिनु भो
श्रिमान - अनि के गरिस त ?
श्रीमति - त्यै तौलिया निकालेर टाउको छोपे...

May 15, 2012

True Lovers - what should be like..?

True Lovers
Are Like Upper & Lower Eyelids!
They Often Meet
Because They Miss Each Other
and
When They Meet,
They Don't See The World Around ..??

why men kiss in women lips - question answer

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Q:Why do most men prefer to kiss
a woman's lips?

Ans:That's da
best way to shut woman's
horizontal lips and open the
vertical one

HEATED, BEATED & COMPRESSED Person is called HUSBAND.

HEATED Gold is called - Ornament
BEATED Copper is called - Wire
COMPRESSED Carbon is called - Diamond
&
HEATED, BEATED & COMPRESSED Person is called HUSBAND.

good date vs awesome date - ends with what what?

A good date end with good dinner.....
.
but awesome date end after a breakfast....
.
who ever understand hit like...aru haru ooggy n cockroses herna jau

Cute Proposal from a boy to girl - will be it accepted ?

Cute Proposal. ?

Boy: Aren't Your Legs Paining?

Girl: No Why Are You Asking?
...
Boy: Because You Have Been Running In My Mind For A Long Time !?! -.-

mother's VS girlfriend's tears in the eye

Q : What's the difference between Mother's & Girlfriend's tears??
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A Classic Answer..
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Mother's tears "EFFECT Our HEART"
&
Girlfriend's tears "EFFECT Our POCKET"....xD :P

May 3, 2012

multi sim mobile and girl friend

रोमांटिक मुड मा !!!!
केटि: तिमि मलाई कति माया गर्छौ?

केटा: मेरो दिल मोबाईल हो तिमि तेस्को सिम कार्ड हौ..

केटि: भगवान म कति धेरै भग्यमानि छु..

केटa: Thanks GOD येस्लाई के थहा मेरो चाईनिज मोबाईल मा 5 वटा सिम कार्ड जान्छ भन्ने.. :P

at honeymoon - only kiss- no bath next morning.. hurray

सुहागरात का दिन केटाले

wife लाई kiss मात्र गरेर सुत्यो ।

भोली पल्ट बिहान सासुले

भनिन:- बुहारी मन्दिर जानी हो ??

जानु भन्दा पहिला नुहाउनु ल ।

बुहारिले रिसाउदै :- सासु जि..!

अरु सबै साफ छ .!

खाली brush मात्र गरे पुग्छ :P

Nepali Funny Jokes